A Fairly Odd Intergalactic Bounty Hunter
by slashmaster420
Summary: Timmy Turner is enjoying living it up thanks to his latest wish, but when he meets his new neighbor, Samus Aran, things get shaken up a bit. WARNING: This story is extremely dark even by my own standards. Read at your own risk.
1. Chapter 1

The stereo was blaring. Timmy jammed out all around the apartment to the music, singing along and generally freaking the fuck out.

"Turn down for what!?" chanted the boy through his big buck teeth.

His latest wish had turned out fantastic. Getting a chance to live alone was all he could have hoped for; no nagging from his parents, no chores, he could do whatever he wanted. And he loved it.

"Cosmo! Wanda! Come party with me!"

"That's alright, Timmy," Wanda said. "I don't think I quite have the energy for all this."

"IIIII'll party with you, Timmy! Turn down for what!" shouted Cosmo.

The two danced for a while with Wanda off on the sidelines, obviously annoyed by the loud partying. Before long, it began to get on someone else's nerves as well. The music was loud, but it wasn't loud enough to shake the ground.

"What was that?" Timmy asked. He listened closely as the floor shook again and as it did he heard a strange whirring sound coming from the floor below. It happened one more time, and Timmy was sure he wasn't imagining it.

"Guys, I think I'm gonna head downstairs and check out whatever that was down there," Timmy said turning off the stereo.

"We'll come with you, Timmy. Best to be careful," Wanda said, and with that they were off down the stairs to the lower level of apartments.

"213A," said Timmy, "the apartment below mine." He knocked on the door and heard heavy footsteps approaching the door. He was a bit frightened, but with Cosmo and Wanda by his side, there was no real danger here.

The door opened and Timmy's jaw dropped. In the doorway stood some kind of humanoid robot. It's armor was shades of red and orange, and an entire arm had been replaced by a blaster cannon. Timmy was speechless in the face of this awesome machine.

No one spoke for a moment, but Timmy was finally able to put aside his amazement and speak. "H...Hi. My name's Timmy Turner and I believe I live in the apartment above you."

"Ah. So you're the little shit that's been making all that racket."

Timmy was caught off guard by the immediate hostility. "Yeah, well what the fuck were you doing that was causing so much noise right back?"

"Come on in and I'll show you," was the unexpected response.


	2. Chapter 2

Though seemingly unfriendly at first, this robot, whose name Timmy had learned to be Samus, had allowed him in and showed him a lot of cool stuff. He found out that the noise he'd heard had been something called it's "screw attack," and even though Timmy had the endless potential to wish for anything his imagination could create, he'd never seen anything quite so awesome.

"Samus, that is so fucking cool! It must be awesome to be a robot with that kind of flexibility."

"Actually, Timmy, I want to show you something else too." With that, the head of the robot began to change, and Timmy realized it wasn't a head at all, but just a helmet.

"Holy shit!? You're... a girl!?"

"Yes, Timmy," Samus responded with a cute little smile. It made Timmy blush. "It's been a while since I've seen one, but if I remember right, what I see going on in your pants is a sign that you like that."

Timmy looked down and saw the biggest pants tent he'd ever had. His dick was rock hard.

"You haven't even seen my body yet..."

With that Samus changed before Timmy's eyes, the robotic armor giving way to a sleek blue suit. He saw every curve of her body and her huge, voluptuous breasts.

"Oh god, Samus, I want to fuck you so bad." She smiled again and came a little closer.

"You want to fuck me?" she said coyly, teasing him. "Well, Timmy, there's just one problem with that..."

"What, baby?" Timmy said, playing along.

She leaned in close and breathed heavily into his ear. "_I _want to fuck _you._" she whispered, but Timmy didn't have a chance to enjoy the moment, because just as the last word came out of her mouth, she pounced on him and pinned him to the couch.

"Samus!? What are you-"

"Shut up!" she shouted without letting him finish. "Timmy, I'm going to be the one to fuck _you_ today and you're going to like it."

"What do you mean, baby?" Timmy asked. Just as he finished saying it Samus swiftly jolted her head forward and bit Timmy's upper lip and kept biting harder and harder until he could taste blood. He tried to scream but wasn't able.

When she finally let his lip go she instantly spoke up. "Don't. Talk. Listen." The fear in Timmy's eyes was shouting out. He had thought he would be safe with Cosmo and Wanda by his side, but without the ability to talk, he also couldn't wish.

"I've heard you upstairs when you talk. Your weasily little voice is very hard to ignore. I've heard you talk to your little... Cosmo and Wanda. They grant wishes. I want you to make a wish for me."

"What... I... don't know what you're talking about."

She bit his already wounded and bleeding lip, hurting it harder than before. "Shut. The fuck. Up, Timmy. Don't lie to me you little bitch. Make the wish." She bit again for good measure.

"Okay okay! I'll make the wish... what do you want?" Timmy sobbed, tears beginning to spill from his eyes.

Samus leaned over to his ear slowly and whispered very quietly. She pulled her head back and looked him in the eyes; they were full of pure, abject terror.

"Samus... no I ca-" but he couldn't finish before she leaned down and viciously tore at his lip another time. Full-on crying now, screaming, Timmy shouted "Okay! I'll d-d-do it..." He took a deep breath. "Cosmo... Wanda... I... Wish..."

Samus had a maniacal look in her eyes, an evil grin spread across her lips. As Timmy hesitated she shouted at him to spit it out.

"I wish Samus had a giant thorny strap on to fuck my little ass with."

"T... Timmy..." started Wanda, but Timmy shouted back at her.

"Just do it before she hurts me any more..." he sobbed, his voice raising in pitch at the end of the sentence. Their magic wands flew up and the stars lit brightly, and with a poof, Samus had the nastiest, thorniest dildo he had ever seen strapped onto her.

She hopped off of Timmy but kept hold of his arms to keep him pinned. She flipped him over onto his stomach and shimmied down his little pants.

He cried hysterically. "Please, Samus! Why are you doing this to me!?" But the only response he received was a laugh.

Samus grabbed the thorny cock at the base and began to rub it up and down along Timmy's asscrack, teasing him, showing him how big what he was about to receive was. Brushing over his asshole, she stopped and poked at it with the tip of the dildo. She could feel how tense his muscles were.

"Timmy, Timmy, darling... If you stay tensed up in fear, it's only going to make the pain worse. You've gotta relax, baby..." Timmy just sobbed loudly and couldn't respond in words. "Alright, well it's up to you. Here it comes..."

With that Samus shoved the tip into Timmy's ass and he let out a shrill gasp. She began to move in and out, the discomfort for Timmy almost unbearable stacked on top of the way she had his face buried into the seat, his arms pinned behind his back.

"This is the smooth part, baby. But I know you want it deeper so you can feel the thorns." She let out a sick little laugh as she said it, savoring Timmy's vocal response. The sounds of his sobs, gasps, groans, all were pure ecstasy to her.

"Timmy, I want you to make another wish for me. I want you to wish for me to fuck you harder and deeper."

Timmy couldn't even speak coherent words through his cries. "K-k-k-k-k," the only syllable he could get out. Samus thrusted harder into his ass and he could feel the flesh around his rim tearing.

"COSMO!" he shouted, finally getting it out. "Wanda..." he continued. "I... wish!... that... Samus..." he kept going, punctuated by the thrusts that were tormented his poor little cavity. She began to speed up a little, fed up with the way he was taking his sweet time. He said the words altogether now, but every thrust gave his voice a tremor. "I! Wish! Samus! Would! Fuck! My! Little! Ass! Deeper! And! Harder!"

"That's it, my little pink hatted bitch!" Samus shouted, a huge grin across her face as she savored his torment. Tears in their eyes, Cosmo and Wanda raised their little wands again, and with a twinkle, Samus suddenly felt an outside force pushing and pulling her hips along in motion. Blood began to drip down in more than drops from the dainty little hole as he took the spiked cock all the way to the hilt.

"Ahhhhhhhhhuhhhuhhh!" Timmy shouted. He sobbed, he screamed, no matter how loud he shrieked in pain Samus wouldn't give in. He felt one of her hands move from his waist, reached around underneath his stomach and firmly grasped his little pecker.

"Timmy!" she screamed with a firm sense of command in her voice, still pounding his ass mercilessly. "Why the fuck isn't your little worthless dick hard for me? I don't want you to fucking lie to me when you tell me you like this."

"Ahhhhhhhhh I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" he pleaded. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't even get a tingle down there.

"Alright you little faggot bitch!" she screamed in sadistic frustration. She firmly grabbed his little pair of balls in her hand and gave a squeeze so tight it hurt Timmy all through his body to the tips of his fingers. He couldn't help but throw up.

"Look what you've fucking done now you little bitch!" she yelled. She let go of his balls and smacked him hard in the side of the head. He let out a little squeak but by this point he was running out of energy to cry with. He stared down in front of him at the puke streaked couch in shame, his eyes red, his mouth hanging dully open. He started to feel light in the head, dizzy, and in a few moments he couldn't stay up any longer and collapsed face first into his own vomit.

"Timmy!? Timmy!?" Samus shouted angrily. She smacked his head a few more times but there was no response. She slowed down with her hips. "This worthless fucking larvae gave out on me!" She pulled out and flipped him over. His eyes were rolled up, his face smeared and caked with puke. "Fucking. Worthless. Piece of shit." She smacked him hard across the face and then spit on it. She picked him up from the couch and threw him onto the hard floor with a little thud. Laying face down, pants around his ankles, blood smeared down his thighs, he was a sad pathetic sight.

Samus sat down on the other end of the couch, undid the strap on and then unzipped her suit. Legs spread out so she could see Timmy's crushed, broken body between them, she began to rub her clitoris. She rubbed hard and fast. She was spreading blood all over herself from what was on her hands.

After a moment, her hips began to jerk. She moaned loudly. Her hips finally bucked into her hand and she started to scream as her orgasm rushed over her. She kept rubbing as she came. When she finally settled back down she relaxed into her seat and kept staring at Timmy's body for a minute. She breathed deeply. Finally, she slowly turned her head over to the other end of the room. Both fairies shifted their attention from the mangled body to lock eyes with Samus. The look of horror and pure sorrow in their normally colorful eyes had made them look gray. Samus smiled.

"Thank you," was all she had to say to them.


End file.
